Praise God

I was able to catch up on all bills. All my bills are current, and all utilities, taxes, insurances, and mortgage payments are paid up in full. This is such a relief.

This month I am also on target to pay all my monthly bills as well.

I still have debt, but all the monthly payments are current.

I am praising God as it is all His money. Also praising my church, family, and friends for all their support and prayers.

~Becky

The post about let down

Ever since I was little I would always get really excited about a holiday or my birthday or just a special day. Once the day came and went though usually my expectations were not met and I would feel let down.

Yesterday was my 33rd birthday. It was a great day. Josh made me breakfast in bed. My mom also brought breakfast. Jason's grandmother brought lunch. I got flowers from my friend delivered via a florist. I was spoiled.

Yet still I found myself sad at the end of the day. I actually went to bed having a good cry (doesn't every girl need one of those now and again.)

I do not want to seem ungrateful, because I really am. I am so blessed. I have so many amazing people in my life who love me so much.

Yet I still get these over the top romantic ideas in my head about how things are supposed to be. It is like I am wearing rose colored glasses half the time.

One of the things that did upset me is that my son Jason did nothing to acknowledge my birthday. No homemade card, no sweet thing (like Josh who made me breakfast in bed.) He actually said a few times yesterday, that he forgot it was my birthday. Now I am not sure what I expect from a 14 year old, but it hurts me like he does not care. Even though I know that he does.

Another thing that made me upset is that is was a Wed. and thus no celebrating could actually happen (like going to dinner or out to do something fun.) It was just a regular day for me with work, and homeschooling, and even some chores.

In my life I have set things up to fail many times just by my expectations. I expect if I plan a field trip the boys will not fight that day. I expect that if I clean my house it will stay that way for longer than 5 minutes. I expect a holiday to be all fun and loving and perfect.

But even I know their really is no perfect. Besides my idea of perfect is not the same as someone else's idea of perfect.

One thing that helps me with my let down is to be grateful for everything I do. Also to help and do special things for other people really lifts my mood.

Turning the situation from about me to about Christ is really the best thing to do. I should have cracked open my Bible last night instead of having a pity party. I should pray about each day and seek His will and not my will for each trip, vacation, holiday, and special days.

Do you ever get let down about situations?

~Becky

In an Instant

 

 

 

In mid Sept. my mom and stepfather treated us to a family vacation down at the Jersey shore. They rented the cutest beach house and bought tons of food. A week of relaxing, bike rides, board games, swimming, boogie boarding, and lounging around in the sand was planned. The above pictures, I think are from the first day.

The second time we attempted boogie boarding had different results. I think it was the second full day of vacation, I was up at the house making lunch. My sister was in the house reading. My mom had Kaiden down playing in the sand. My stepfather was boogie boarding with Jason and Josh. Apparently they all got caught up in a rip tide and ended up being pushed sideways and out to sea. Jason managed to use all his strength to  swim back in and run up to the house. He could barely talk as he tried to tell me to call the police. Once I realized it was not he who needed immediate medical attention, I ran down to the beach to watch helplessly as Josh and Scott were managing to stay on boogie boards but without actually coming back to shore. Someone else had already called the police and an off duty lifeguard at this point.

I have never felt such fear and helplessness in my life. I was staring into my son's face, and thinking if Scott can not get him back in what could I do. I began to pray and hold in the tears. Finally (I think they were about there about 12 minutes total) the lifeguard used a surfboard to bring Josh in. He just fell into my arms in tears. I had to continue to fight mine back. I walked him up to the house and he stayed holding on to me for a long time.

All three were exhausted from the ordeal. We did nothing else that day. After Josh was calm and Jason was resting I went into my room and bawled my eyes out. In an instant I could have lost my boys. Praise Jesus I did not. Having lot my cousin Cristie and then Eric made this ordeal all the more haunting, all the more real. A new day is not guaranteed to any of us. Today is all we may ever have.

So this incident sort of halted our vacation. No one wanted to even go near the sand, let alone in the water (except Kaiden, who was blissfully unaware of the entire ordeal.) I know that we live near the ocean and bay and we will get back in, but immediately after was just too soon.

By Thur. we decided to just cut the trip short and go home. (We were supposed to stay until Sat.) It was a relief for us all just to leave the nightmare behind.

This trip could have had a different ending, and I am so grateful it did not and that we all came home safely, just with a new respect for the ocean.

I am grateful my for stepfather, Scott being there and keeping Josh calm and safe. I am thankful that Jason managed to swim back in on his own (and I am quiet proud of him as well.) I am thankful I have a family who wants to vacation with us. I am so blessed.

-Becky

us exploring the beach on our first day (Lady was there too)

                                                  I was there too, with Josh and Kaiden

                                            the backyard of the beach house we rented

Financial Update

Here it is Oct. 1st. I have not posted too many financial updates, because I have been behind on everything for some time now.

I am currently all caught up on:
Mortgage
Taxes
Gas
Electric
Sewer
Car Insurance
House Insurance

I am behind on:
$200 Water bill (this is like for 4 months)
$160 Phone/Cable/Internet (this is 2 months behind)

My debt is higher than it was, but all monthly payments are current:
$700 Mastercard
$400 Kohl's
$1,000 Amazon

I have had to ask my church and family for help to get the stuff that I caught up on. It is very humbling and frustrating; but for July & Aug. I received no child support from Jason's dad, which really impacted my budget.

The Mastercard was used for Lady's grooming and unexpected vet bills and medicine as she was sick last month. I also had to fix a van that was given to me and register and get plates for it; all went on the Mastercard.

I should be able to pay all my regular monthly bills this month. I will not have any extra to throw at past due water and phone/cable/internet bills, but I should be able to make one full payment to each, avoiding shut off on those items. (By the way I am required to have a home phone for in home daycare, or I would just cancel it completely.) Hopefully Oct. will not have any emergencies that once again blow my budget (we have had so many in past 6 months with sewer backing up into house, multiple car repairs, Lady getting sick, and so on.)

I am so thankful for my family and church for helping me from falling off the edge. I am so blessed.

How is your budget?

-Becky

p.s. I know that I should have an emergency fund. I did at one point, but it is all depleted. Right now, even though I work over 40 hours 6 days a week, at numerous in home and out of the home jobs my income is only just about my bills. Their is barely money for our needs, let alone wants. Praying for no more emergencies for now is the best I can do.

p.p.s. I just paid my entire past due water bill. Now the only past due bill I have is my cable/phone/internet bill which is $160 (since it is 2 months behind.) Praise the Lord!!!

September

As you know it is already Sept. So far this month we have:

had family barbecue to celebrate Jason's 8th grade graduation
celebrated family birthday's (mom, sister, grandmother, cousin, aunt, brother)
fixed some holes in the walls
painted Josh's room
primed Jason's room (to be painted today)
gotten Lady shaved
taken Lady to vet for a UTI
went to Jason's dad's family picnic (we go every year, Jason's dad does not)
Jason had one visit with the chiropractor
watched Kaiden
watched Ava, (before and after school care)
cleaned out old homeschool closet
got awesome new shelf for homeschool closet (at a yard sale $20, so it is new to us)

Still to come for Sept.:

finish both boys rooms, including new blinds, and some shelving
organize all homeschool stuff
homeschool lesson plans
first day of homeschool Tues. Sept. 25th
family vacation to South Jersey (coming soon)
I have a class (childcare, I have to do hours each year to keep my daycare license)
Josh is going to see Sesame Street live with Kaiden
I am going to my first ever chiropractor appointment
I have two or three houses to clean
I will have a small gyn procedure done
I am participating in a Walk For Life to raise money for Solutions Pregnancy Center
Jason will have another chiropractor appointment (he goes every two weeks)
I will have a visit from the agency that issues the daycare license (they do three a year, two scheduled, and one surprise)
I will do some out of home childcare
I will do some in home childcare
We will have two or three more no drive days
We will attend Church on Sundays
We may attend church on Wed. evenings for children and youth night
One car will get fixed so I can have a car again

What are your Sept. plans?

-Becky

Summer

Summer is almost officially over and yet we didn't really embrace it this year. We had some limitations with my car being out of commission, and also limited financial resources this summer that may have contributed to the lack of doing too much summer stuff. Also Jason was still sick on occasion with his Epstein Barr and food allergy / sensitivity stuff.

Josh and I went to Sandy Hook once for a horseshoe crab class. Josh also went there again for a fireman class with my mom. We all went to the bay once to play in the sand. But we never actually swam in the ocean this summer (this is very odd.)

We did do Six Flags Great Adventure twice. We did Hurricane Harbor (water park) once, but it rained after one hour of us being there. We did Runaway Rapids (water park) once as well. We all went to the boardwalk once or twice with my brother. And Jason went to Wildwood with his dad's family once. We did go swimming about ten times in a few friend's pool. Jason did get to kayak once at the house I babysit, and once with Scott. Josh did a clay art class. I took six awesome walks in the woods while he was in art class.

We also participated in my church's Vacation Bible School; which we do every summer.

We really just had normal days, with a bit more relaxing added in. My work schedule remained the same. Jason did his horseback riding throughout the summer as well. We actually were still doing school until the beginning of August.

We did make some yummy sun tea a few times, and awesome fruit puree ice pops as well. We did lots of grilling (the clams were my favorite.) We got bite by tons of mosquitoes. We chased a few bunny rabbits. We looked at the stars and moon a few nights, and attempted to catch fireflies as well.

Josh said his favorite thing about summer was, "swimming in pools."

My favorite thing about summer was central air and walking in the woods barefoot after it rained.

Jason is still in bed, so I will ask him later.

How was your summer?

-Becky

Graduate

Jason has finished 8th grade and will be starting high school soon. I am so proud of him.

 

This is my mom and Jason

 

 

                                                       Jason, my mom, and stepfather

 

 

                                                                      Me and Jason

 

We had a great party at my mom's today. My mom and stepfather are so amazing. They do so much for us.