Thursday, March 1, 2012

Single Parenting

I feel like it is insensitive to me when parents with a spouse away say they feel like they are a single parent. They may feel overwhelmed and stressed, but they actually are not a single parent. They will have other spouse home usually pretty soon. Even a spouse away in the military, although I am sure with it's own unique challenges, is not the same as actually being a single parent every single day.

Being an actual single parent I have to:

be pray warriors for my boys
love my boys enough for two parents (which is impossible)
be a referee between boys fights
make sure my boys are getting an education
make sure they understand their changing male bodies (but I am a girl)
make sure my boys will grow into Godly men (again, I am a girl)
schedule, remember, and actually show up to doctor's appointments (with special needs their are many of these, at least 4 a month in addition to regular doctor's, dentists, etc.)
wash the laundry, dry the laundry, fold the laundry, put all the laundry away
clean the house
meal plan
food shop, carry in groceries, put all groceries away
cook all meals
clean up after each and every meal
set boundaries and enforce them
encourage physical play
show interest in the boy things they do that I am clueless about (i.e. video games)
do all yard work
do all home repairs
create family budget, follow family budget
earn all income to sustain family budget
deal with stuff that comes up that is not in budget
handle all the sick days (praise God we have not had too many of these)
handle all the non compliant days (we do have these about 5x's a week)

You get the picture. I do all of this without another parent each and every day.

Of course God sustains and blesses us daily. Without Him I could not handle any of this. But it would be nice to have a loving spouse to carry some of this burden as well. It would especially be nice to have someone to share the love I have for these boys with. It also breaks my heart that my boys don't have a loving father in their lives either.

Encoraging their need for physical play I took them to bay on Sunday and let them climb the sand dunes (they are about the be reconstructed. I know you shouldn't be on sand dunes, but they will be overhauled over next two months.) They didn't want to leave even after an hour. I was so ready for my Sunday nap (lol.)



Anonymous said...

What a great topic to reflect on. I'm neither a parent, nor a single parent, but I appreciate learning about all that goes into keeping your family running.

I'm of the opinion that two people aren't even enough! So many eyes and hearts are needed.

You're doing a fantastic job, I hope you know. You are at superhero-level. ;^)